This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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