whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
it's great music for shaving your balls
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
