Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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