I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize