Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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