I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
