Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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