either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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