just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
party gras won. party gras always wins.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
