When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
