Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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