Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
