dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
In America we eat man semen.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I think people are normalizing furries
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
