Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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