it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
