i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
