Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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