Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize