College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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