he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
