Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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