I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize