Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize