nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
