she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I've blown a few things in my day
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Everyone says I win the strip club
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
