The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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