You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize