I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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