hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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