those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
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I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
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Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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