so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
