I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
