Don't you send me to vm
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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