I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
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and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
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I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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