I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
