your thong is hanging out like whoa
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood and glitter go together right?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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