32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
