for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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