only if we run a train.
done.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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