I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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