Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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