You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
