i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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