I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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