Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
did i just pee glitter
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize