bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
