try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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