Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize
