Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
