So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I have aggressive nipples.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize