woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
